Around midnight!

So i was listening to jazmine sullivan and she has this song called round midnight. its funny because its midnight and not only that but memories really do start when it comes around that time. its like they just pour into my head and i start to think about exactly what i was doing so long ago at this time and boy oh boy i was doing a lot whether it was crying, laughing, joking around, coping with the present, having long talks on the phone. its so0o confusing the way life is. i find it so weird that when you really are having fun time flies so fast and when you are having that fun what can you do ya no... i constantly think of what could i do if i didnt want this perfect night to end but it has to then the next day is a nightmare. i wonder why that happens? 16 and pregnant is very good i think it reaches out to a lot of pregnant teens that need guidance in a way or teens that are on the verge of having kids. those kids that are born around this time are going to be a huge generation. i hope their lives are way better then our generation because we are all directed in the wrong pathway to0o me! haha well anyways this upcoming weekend i have to work at dsw and i am going to kings dominion with my friend dsean and his family it should be fun i cant wait actually. i havent been there in a long while!!! haha but i guess this is about it im getting pretty darn tired and i have to take my mom to work in the morning idk when is the next time i will post something but hopefully soon!!!!

mistakes or just the wrong person?

Ok so this has really been bugging me for a long period of time! How is it that everyone that i have ever been with is happily taken and im stuck still in the single pool?! seems like it took them noe time but me on the other hand im still awaiting my prince charming! I mean what do i do that makes me remain single for so long? im thinking should i change but i was getting my hair done today and the lady that does my hair said something so important today that i couldnt let it slip my mind. ive noticed that sense i have changed i havent did nothing but mess up mess up mess up. finally i know the reason because how can i be someone im not obviously im not suppose to be like this because if i was i think i would see things way more clearer then i see now. It is pretty blurry from what i see... when i was the regular antoinette my life was on diamonds and pearls now that i have changed to this little alter ego "nette fierce" or "nette" i havent had any good luck ive had days were they are the best but that next day will be the worst?! i wonder why that happens because im being who i am not. the real me is way far from what i am now. Antoinette enjoys writing, being in love, talking on the phone for hours rather then texting, wearing whatever is comfortable and not trying to impress the next eye, being at home and not worrying about anything, cheering, not having to work for my happiness and ive always said that until i changed. the sad part about this all is that i cant go back i have to continue to move forward, but maybe i can start being me just in an improved mature way... i will only have happiness if i am me and not pretending to be someone else.... although i dont ever pretend to be someone else i just try to change myself into someone that is so0o different and now i see i need to just take myself as i am. have you ever felt like you have been making too many mistakes in life? well maybe god has shown you the message already its not regrets its not silly careless mistakes its just that the way you are or have become maybe isnt a way he wants you. i guess from now on i will do my best to stop becoming someone im not... hope you can do the same.....